Girl, You Are Doing Too Much

Geplaatst op 02-06-2026

I got a text other night from a homegirl who wanted to see what I could do about helping her “he’s not my boyfriend, we’re just friends” a job.

INSERT SCREW FACE HERE

Homegirl: Hey SG, do you know of any accounting jobs. NotMyBF is looking to get into accounting and I want him to stay in close to me. He’s talking about moving but I figure if I can find him a job here he won’t leave.

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DOUBLE SCREW FACE

I wanted to reply:

Bitch, he is not your man. Why are you acting like his agent?

Instead I wrote:

I don’t know of any opening but I’ll keep my eyes open. I didn’t know you were together now. Congrats.

Homegirl: We aren’t together, but we are exclusive.

Yeah, right. Whatever the hell that means.

Homegirl is making a huge mistake but at the time I didn’t (and still don’t) have the energy to tell her the error of her ways. She is trying to win a man by helping him map out his life. She thinks that by finding him a job she is going to lock him in.

The real question is whether he asked for her or if she offered her help/ doing this without his knowledge.

Let’s start with option #1:

He asked.

In order for a man to ask a woman to help him find a job he must be completely desperate or totally lazy. The male ego won’t allow him to admit to his woman that he needs help. Men don’t even ask for directions much less employment. It says that he is not capable of handling his own. Yet, if he did ask it means he knows you will go above and beyond for him. It is something you have exhibited before and this time he is willing to take advantage of it. But this in no way means he is going to stick around or feel indebted to you. Don’t be surprised if when he gets the job he starts working so much you don’t see him. Before you know it, he’s pushing you to the side.

She offers / She does this behind his back

This is the classic cause of a woman “doing too much”. He’s not your man and you aren’t married to him. Outside of keeping your ears and eyes open for when something becomes available that is nothing more you should do. All this texting me at odd hours just to help you keep your dick supply close is a bit much don’t you think. I made the mistake of trying to Joe Jackson a man I was dating—calling up people, making appointments, working on dude’s resume. No, I wasn’t his “girl” but I wanted him to see how good of a cheerleader I could be. Didn’t work and in the end I played myself.

Before you start throw hate, I’m not saying that a woman should help her man out. But the key words are…HER MAN.

It’s bad enough that he is getting the cow and the milk for free but now you giving up her time and energy. He isn’t invested in you nearly as much as you are in him. Situations like these never end up well. If he does stick around it is because it’s been years and he give you time served points, puts a ring on it cause he realizes that he used you up and no one else will take his bullshit demands.

Hey, but like I said, I’ll keep my eyes open.